Afrostoic Resilience: Wisdom from Seneca & Proverbs

“We are more often frightened than hurt; and we suffer more in imagination than in reality.” — Seneca

Pull up a seat. The fire’s warm and the night is listening.

There’s an old rhythm in African life, a kind of knowing that doesn’t shout.
You’ll find it in the backs of grandmothers carrying more than water.
In the eyes of young boys sent too early to be men.
In the bent shoulders of fathers who never said the words, but always brought the food.

We carry things, don’t we?

• Some of us carry names that were never truly ours.

• Some of us carry fear like it’s family.

• Some of us carry strength so quietly, no one ever asks if we’re tired.

Stoicism by the Fire

And then Stoicism steps into the firelight.
It doesn’t offer comfort, it offers clarity.

Seneca once said we suffer more in imagination than in reality.
I believe him.
Because I’ve seen people break not under life, but under what they thought life might become.

The storm they carried in their minds was louder than the one in the sky.

But here’s the twist, Chief: African wisdom doesn’t contradict Stoicism. It completes it.

The Wisdom in Our Load

In Kenya, among the Kikuyu there is a saying:
"Wĩtũire ndũngĩaga wĩtũĩrĩ."
(What you’ve carried in silence is heavier than what you speak about.)

See, we’re not told to avoid the burden.
We’re told to choose it wisely.

You don’t drop the firewood halfway through the forest.
But you also don’t keep carrying someone else’s log.

So I ask you—what do you carry?
And maybe deeper still: who packed your bag for you?

Let the Firelight Ask You

If we were gathered around this fire tonight, and I passed you the talking stick,
I wouldn’t ask you to impress us.

I’d ask you to tell the truth.

• What do you carry that no one sees?

• What weight did your father hand you? Your mother? Your lineage?

• What are you carrying that is no longer yours to bear?

Not every load must become a legacy.
Some burdens are meant to be burned.

This Week’s Reflection:

As you walk into the new week, ask yourself: “Is this mine to carry?”
If not, put it down.
If yes, carry it with pride. But carry it consciously.

And remember what Seneca whispered:
"Much of our suffering is imagination. The real world is quieter than we fear".